An interesting problem

I recently found the website of Derek Sivers. He has some interesting things to say both in writing and on video. Nothing earth shattering but interesting anyway. Watching the videos I noticed that he is one of those perpetually happy and upbeat types of people. On his page describing books he likes he indicates this comes from his personal philosophy being related to the stoics and recommends a book on stoicism. For the first time in my life I am afraid to read a book. Not because it might be bad but because it might show that I have been living my life wrong. It is an interesting problem. If I read the book and decide I have wasted my life so far I can attempt to make my life better, but what if I can't? Then my whole life will be a waste. If I don't read the book I will just be hiding my head in the sand, hoping to ignore reality and not improve myself.

I have to decide one way or the other, not deciding is of course by default deciding not to read the book. Should I continue in ignorance or should I learn and maybe be disappointed? I will have to think a bit.

Looks and the beach

Several times I have been in discussions about nude beaches and sooner or later somebody will make a comment that the sort of people who go to nude beaches shouldn't because they aren't good looking. I have always found this an odd comment because from what I hear people who regularly go to nude beaches go to enjoy the beach NOT to be looked at. If you want to see good looking nude people they have bars and such for that. The point of nude beaches is the beach.

The same goes of course for regular beaches. People comment that this person shouldn't be wearing a bikini because they don't look good in it. Well, maybe there intent was to get a tan, not look good.

If your intent in going to the beach is to look as good as possible then maybe you want to cover up some, the average person has physical flaws and covering them makes you look better. However, if your intent is to get a tan then maybe you need to uncover some. If your intent is somewhere in between then you will have to dress or undress appropriately.

If your intent in going to the beach is to see good looking people without clothing then you have failed from the start. Most people aren't good looking. If fact, most people don't go to the beach so you can look at them. They go for the sun, sand, and water.

Having been in several of these discussions I always find it odd how so many people seem to think others should act a certain way simply because it is what they (not the other people) want. I have met many who say only good looking people (and themselves) should go to the beach, because they want to only see good looking people and seem to feel the rest of humanity is here for their entertainment. I have met a couple of people that say only fit people should go to the gym, everybody who isn't fit should exercise at home until they become fit enough to look good and show off their bodies at the gym.

People are crazy. I go to the beach for the beach, not to provide entertainment for others. If you don't like the way I look tough, I am not there for you I am there for me.

Marriage contracts

I just read a news article saying Mexico City is considering time limited marriage contracts with the time being as little as two years. When you start the contract you decide how to split money and children, and if you don't renew the contract you are automatically divorced.

http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/44724855/ns/today-weddings/t/til-do-us-part-mexico-mulls--year-marriage/from/toolbar

I like the idea, mainly because it forces people to make the tough decisions up front instead of arguing and having to spend a lot of money on lawyers. Will it be good for society? Who knows. The fighting and such that goes with a split up will probably continue but at least this would keep it out of the courts. And maybe people would have a more realistic idea of marriage when they are forced to make the tough decisions about children and money up front.

Sending clear signals

I read a lot of science fiction. This year I read two different book series that describe societies where your relationship status, interest in finding someone, what you are looking for, what type of person you are, etc. are clearly shown by what you wear. In the one case it was jewelry and in the other it was clothing style and color. It would be really nice if people could send such clear signals. Knowing that someone was approachable or wanted to be left alone would make life so much easier.

Of course people would abuse it and lie, just like they always do. But I really like the idea of societies that tell the truth and that send clear signals.

Teachers not allowed to have a life?

I just read a news article about a teacher who was fired because several pictures and videos of her having sex were sent to parents and school board members. Note that she wasn't having sex with her students, just sex. Apparently teachers aren't allowed to have sex? Were do all the little teachers come from?

In recent years teachers have been fired for facebook posts showing them drinking alcohol, attending bachelorette parties, etc. The school boards have said that while the teachers weren't doing anything illegal they were being poor role models for the students.

I am really glad I never became a teacher. Given the stupidity of these actions I can't imagine why anybody would want to be a teacher. You get fired for having a life? Well no, they are fired for letting somebody take a picture of them having a life. Stupid.

It has been a rough week

The past week has been rough. The days have been alternating intense pain and extreme sleepiness. The nights have been mostly not sleeping but so tired I can't do anything.

Sometime during the week (I am not sure exactly when) a young paintballer in Serbia killed himself. I don't know the details but I gather he had been homeless and staying with various friends and relatives for over a year, then his fiance left him. He was a happy, energetic, outgoing kind of guy trapped in a mess. There are lots of people like him in the world, all trying to live a decent life and trapped by circumstance in bad times and bad locations. And there is nothing I could have done to make it better even if I had known he existed before his death was posted on a paintball forum I read.

I like to help people. It depresses me to see so many people who need help. Some have created their own situations but others are in bad situations through no fault of their own. It is those people who deserve help but there are literally millions of them. There is no way I could help them all. Heck, there is no way I could even meet them all.

Life isn't perfect. It is often painful and traumatic. But I have hope that someday society will grow to the point where we can help others. Or better yet prevent the conditions that cause people pain.

Being on time

I am very time oriented when I work. I used to do fixed price contracts and you had to know how long things took to do that. One of the things people don't seem to understand is that if you want to be somewhere on time you have to leave on time. If a meeting runs late it pretty much guarantees you will be late for the next meeting, which may in turn make that meeting run late. If everybody showed up on time and used the meeting time effectively the meeting would end on time. Simple, but lots of people don't seem to get it.